“I was about to pour myself a drink when I realized that 2 of my ice cubes were actually pizza rolls.”

“Fell asleep on my charging cable. I have client-facing Zoom meetings today.”

“I do calligraphy. I misplaced the circled in character, which is part of a 300-word scroll that I almost finished after 5 days of work.”

“Just realized I went into the bank and the grocery store like this.”

“Accidentally pushed broil instead of bake.”

“Soaking my hands in milk to help cut through the chili oil from prepping jalapeños. No, I didn’t wear gloves. Yes, I’m a fool.”

“So I forgot to pack my gym shoes.”

“I didn’t notice that the door to my bedroom wasn’t shut properly. At night I woke up to terrible sounds with the thought that a monster was swarming just under the ceiling. When I turned on the flashlight, I saw this!”

“I guess this is why I shouldn’t put my coffee next to my paint water.”

“So my mother learned that you can boil an unopened can of condensed milk to make a caramel. The first few times it worked great, this last time she fell asleep while it was boiling.”

“Took the pill while half asleep and later saw this.”

“Just got home after a month out to find the water running in the bathtub.”

“That filled up fast!” -my wife

“Someone didn’t put the lid on the paint.”

“We only ate pancakes on special occasions. Today we found out that the syrup we had been using expired 7 years ago.”

“Just finished braiding my hair when I found this strand on the back of my neck.”

“My friend and I were watching a horror movie. Whenever a creepy scene appeared, I would hide my face on my friend’s shoulder. Turns out, I forgot to remove my makeup. Now, look what we’ve got.”

“I somehow forgot to put water in the cup before microwaving the ramen. Now my house smells disgusting.”

“After my 17th near-heart-attack, I realized that I really needed to move my lamp.”

“I opened my restaurant in the morning and wanted to drive to my other job. This happened in an empty parking lot! Guess which one is mine!”

“My pickup has been in the shop, so I bought a second one to help with work last week — like mine but one year older. It drains oil at a slightly different angle than mine, and is apparently about 2” closer to the ground..."

“The toilet paper in the outhouse of the farm I work at”

“Went to go use the restroom for a few minutes at work only to come back and find out someone had snapped the clip off of my favorite pen...”

“Decided to work on my birthday today and was going to leave early, but instead 3 people called out sick so here I am 12 and a half hours in and still going...”

“I work in a small coffee shop and today our receipt machine malfunctioned.”

“I dropped a bottle of bleach on the floor at work last night. Ruined my good jeans”

“First time in the office for a while and got this keyboard. What sucks is that I have to write Belgium a lot today.”

“Someone tried stealing this at work today. Now I have to put it all back.”

“Overslept, forgot to pick up my co-worker, and got to work a half-hour late. Just to have my boss accidentally run over my lunch within 5 minutes of being there.”

“Came into work this morning and found this monstrosity.”

“Pictured: a fake apple someone bit at the craft store I work at”

“Decided to go ‘commando’ today at work, noticed several people across the room leave upset during our morning meeting... Now I know why.”